THE LOOK

Larry Krystkowiak was in rare form last week after Utah’s win over Washington.

He said his team passed so poorly “it looked like we were shaving points.” (Note to the Feds: It’s only a figure of speech.) He also admitted he cut his hand karate-chopping a whiteboard before wordlessly glaring down his team through a timeout.

This is known in the business as “the NIT Stare.”

NET-WORTHY

Quin Snyder got a jump on best quotes of the current week after the Jazz’s loss to the Clippers.

He said, “Tonight we showed what a bad team looks like.”

The Brooklyn Nets are saying, “Hey, don't point at us!"

EXTENDED STAY AMERICA

BYU started two freshmen and three sophomores in a loss to Pepperdine. Officials said it was the school’s youngest starting lineup since Dec. 9, 1998.

But since this is BYU, it’s possible some of them were actually on the team in 1998.

FANTASY ISLAND

The Charles Oakley-James Dolan drama took another turn Monday when the two met with NBA commissioner Adam Silver.

Dolan said he plans to welcome Oakley to a Knicks game in the near future.

After Oakley was escorted from Madison Square Garden, last week, the team sent a series of tweets, including one that said, “Everything (Oakley) has said since the incident is pure fiction.”

Much like the fiction surrounding Phil Jackson’s plan to turn around the franchise.

TRIP-TASTIC

UNC-Chapel Hill student body presidential candidate Joe Nail dressed up as Duke’s Grayson Allen, pretending to trip fellow students they passed.

Bill Laimbeer is allegedly suing both Allen and Nail for unauthorized use of his signature moves.

MOVING VIOLATION

The Saint Louis University men’s basketball team had its bus taken by the driver, leaving players and coaches in a lurch.

Linda Edmister was later arrested on a DWI.

Billiken fans hoped to blame the loss to St. Bonaventure on poor transportation, but yes, that train had already left the station.

WAIT HERE

Sportscurmudgeon.com on a baseball proposal to expedite intentional walks: “No more four pitches to the catcher standing there with one arm out like a school crossing guard.”

MIND GAMES

A Scrabble expert wants the game to be added as an Olympic sport.

This seems like a good idea, right after they add mental gymnastics, where participants negotiate their cable bills.

VAMPIRE CHRONICLES

Headline in The Onion: “Bill Belichick Gazes Fondly At Absence Of Reflection In Vince Lombardi Trophy.”